The Recipe for a Bard

Posted by jdhBard | Posted in Poetry, Story | Posted on 31-05-2017

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by Melissa Keindel (amara_strega)

To make a bard one needs to find, the recipe to create its kind. Never easy, always changing, from culture to culture, recipes ranging. Below we find a simple mix, to make a bard, and learn his tricks.

So listen now, as i do tell, a simple bard creation spell:

  • Start with 1 cup honey, for the best stories come from honeyed tongues.
  • Add 1 cup mead to loosen the mind and mouth.
  • A dash of sass, a dash of pluck, a silver coin for good luck.
  • A teaspoon of sage, to impart wisdom
  • A teaspoon of pepper to keep stories spicy
  • A quarter cup of strong beer to add valor and bravado
  • A pinch of salt for flavor
  • A pinch of suger to sweeten the heart
  • A clove of garlic for strength
  • A sprig of Thyme so they may keep time in competition
  • A tablespoon of oats to add humility
  • A cup of spring water to keep the creativity flowing
  • Lastly add to the brew one sprig of eyebright to sharpen the wit and open the mind.

Add to a sturdy pot and boil over the intense flames of the bardic fire. Stir frequently, listening for the tell tale signs of bubbling and free-style rapping that tell you it is almost complete.

Once cooked, allow to cool and take on its natural shape, that of the master storyteller and keeper of sacred tales.

WHY DO PEOPLE SHOUT WHEN ANGRY ????

Posted by jdhBard | Posted in Poetry, Story | Posted on 19-08-2016

A Hindu saint who was visiting the river Ganges to take a bath and found a group of family members on the banks, shouting in anger at each other. He turned to his disciples smiled, and asked.

‘Why do people in anger, shout at each other?’

The Disciples thought for a while, and one of them said, ‘Because we lose our calm, we shout.’

‘But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can as well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner.’ asked the saint

Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the other disciples.

Finally the saint explained, .

‘When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other to cover that great distance.

What happens when two people fall in love? They don’t shout at each other but talk softly, because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is either nonexistent or very small…’

The saint continued, ‘When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper as they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that’s all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.’

He looked at his disciples and said.
‘So when you argue do not let your hearts get distant, Do not say words that distance each other more, Or else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.

The Month of Death 2016

Posted by jdhBard | Posted in Poetry | Posted on 21-01-2016

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Rickman: Hey David.

Bowie: Alan? You too? What took you down?

Rickman: Cancer. You?

Bowie: Me too. Fuck Cancer.

Rickman: Fuck Cancer. With a spoon.

Lemmy: Fuck Cancer!

Rickman: Who’s that guy?

Lemmy: I thought this was the rock star section. They let just anyone in here?

Bowie: Apparently. I’m been searching for Crosby, but I haven’t had much luck.

Lemmy: David Crosby’s dead too?!?

Bowie: No, no… Bing Crosby. Before your time. Before my time, really, if truth be told.

Rickman: I can play the cello…

Lemmy: No you can’t. You’re an actor. You can act like you play the cello. I saw Truly, Madly, Deeply wise-ass.

Rickman: … Asshole.

Bowie: So what do we do now?

Lemmy: We could jam. Maybe actor-boy could learn how to play the spoons.

Angelil: Salut les boys.

Rickman: Who the fuck are you?

Angelil: Calisse… I’m Rene. If there’s one thing I knew how to do in the old life is spot talent early on, and I mean *early* on. Stick with me les gars and we will rock this place.

Original piece written by JD Hickey
January 2016